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Is Premarital Sex Or Sex Before Marriage A Sin | Lies & Truths Exposed?

An Overview Of Premarital Sex Or Sex Before Marriage

Is premarital sex (sex before marriage) or sex before wedding a sin of adultery and fornication? This is one of the questions that has generated much debate among people, especially christians.

When it comes to issues like this, individual or denominational beliefs and opinions do not matter at all. What matters is what the Bible says. This is because the Bible the an answer to all issues in the entire universe. To ease your understanding of the concept, I think it is worthwhile for me to explain the following terms: marriage, wedding, premarital sex / sex before marriage, sex before wedding and sexual immorality.

What is Marriage?

Marriage is simply the conjugal union between a man and a woman. Marriage was instituted by God right from the time of the creation of the world. The first people who participated in marriage were Adam and Eve and, to this day, marriage remains a valid institution.

What is Wedding?

A wedding is a ceremony that marks marriage. People wrongly define a wedding as a ceremony where two people are joined in marriage. No wedding or human being can join a man and a woman. Later, in this article, you’ll see how and when a man and a woman are joined.

What is the Difference Between Marriage and Wedding?

Marriage is simply the conjugal union between a man and a woman. Marriage was instituted by God right from the time of the creation of the world. Adam and Eve were the first married couples, without a wedding, and, to this day, marriage remains Honourable in God’s sight.

A wedding is a ceremony that celebrates marriage.

EMPHASIS: A wedding is not a ceremony where two people are joined in marriage but just a ceremony related to marriage. It is a ceremony that marks marriage not a ceremony thorough which marriage occurs.

Comparing and Contrasting Marriage vs Wedding

Marriage was instituted by God but wedding was instituted by human beings. Although, related, they are different concepts. Marriage is a union while wedding is a ceremony that marks, commemorates or celebrates marriage. It does not cause marriage to take place. For this reason, it can either precede or follow marriage or even be avoided, altogether, without nullifying a marriage.

Does the Bible Condemn or Order a Wedding Since it is not Marriage?

No, the Bible does not condemn a wedding just because it is different from marriage. But it condemns it if any of the wedding rites goes contrary to the word of God. In other words, the Bible never command anyone to hold a wedding to validate a marriage and neither does it condemn it provided that the rites that constitute the ceremony, which varies from culture to culture, does not contravene any of God’s laws.

What is Premarital Sex / Sex Before Marriage?

A premarital sex or sex before marriage is any sexual activity that one engages in before choosing a marriage partner.

Is Premarital Sex / Sex Before Marriage a Sin?

Yes. Premarital sex or sex before marriage is a sin of adultery or fornication. Sex is designed to take place within the confines of marriage. So, every sexual activity, outside of marriage, amounts to sexual immorality and so, is a sin of adultery or fornication, to be specific. However, note that sex before marriage / premarital sex is different from sex before wedding.

What is Sex Before Wedding?

Sex before wedding is any sexual activity between any engaged couples who are yet to be declared married by a religious, legal or traditional official at a wedding.

Is Sex Before Wedding a Sin?

No. Sex before wedding is not a sin, if it is with the same person you have chosen as your marriage partner. However, it is a sin if it occurs between you and someone else, other than your chosen marriage partner.

Is it Wrong or a Sin to Conduct a Wedding for a Pregnant Woman and her Groom?

No, it is neither wrong nor a sin to conduct a wedding between a pregnant woman and her groom. A wedding is different from marriage and it does not originate from God unlike marriage. The Bible does not teach that pregnancy, by one’s marriage partner, before wedding, is wrong or sinful.

Is Sex Before Wedding the Same as Premarital Sex / Sex Before Marriage?

No. Sex before wedding is different from premarital sex /sex before marriage but people mistakenly regard them as the same thing. The former is a sin while the latter is not. Whenever those who consider them as the same, use the expression “premarital sex or sex before marriage”, they always mean sex “before a wedding.” According to the view of those people, any sexual intercourse that is not preceded by a religious, legal or traditional / cultural wedding is a sin of fornication or adultery. This is a direct result of a wrong Biblical exegesis or hermeneutics since the both concepts do not mean the same thing.

What Is Sexual Immorality and What Does the Bible Say About It?

Sexual immorality is any sexual act that contravenes divine regulations. It takes many forms like adultery, incest, bestiality, fornication, homosexuality and others, all which have ample Biblical evidence proving that they are sins. Sexual immorality has been a an intractable problem even before the beginning of recorded history. God hates it and has commanded everyone to refrain from it.

While sex before marriage or premarital sex is a type of sexual immorality, sex between engaged couples before their wedding is not a sin. Before, you doubt me and try to prove me wrong, remember marriage is different from wedding. Marriage came from God whereas wedding came from humans. Remember also that it is not a wedding that validates marriage. God approves marriage without any wedding.

Marriage Can be Completed Without a Wedding

Marriage does not need a wedding to be accepted and blessed by God. If you know when and how marriage occurs, you’ll not be confused about this topic anymore.

When And How Marriage Occurs

Marriage, according to the Bible, in God’s eyes, occurs when a man is joined to his wife (a woman) and the two become one flesh. See GENESIS 2:4 and MARK 10:7-9. This joining of a man and a woman does not occur at a wedding but during sex. Read 1 CORINTHIANS 6:15-17 and you will find out that sex joins people, spiritually, without a wedding. This is one of the reasons God hates the act of having sex with someone who is not your chosen marriage partner. For everyone you have sex with, a spiritual union is formed between you each person and this is unacceptable to God.

The above two Bible portions shows us when and how marriage, the conjugal union between a man and a woman, occurs. No wedding is involved here. In spite of this, as I have stated before, God does not condemn a wedding, if you want and can afford it or if it is necessary to satisfy your spouse’ cultural demands and requirements. However, ensure that the wedding rites does not violate God’s laws.

Why it is Wrong to Teach That Sex Between Couples Before Wedding is a Sin

While it is right to teach that premarital sex / sex before marriage is a sin, it is wrong to teach that sex before wedding is a sin if the act is between engaged couples because, as I have explained above, a wedding is different from a marriage. Below are some of the reasons why you should not teach that sex between marriage partners their before wedding is a sin.

  1. It amounts to adding to the word of God and God forbids this.
  2. It misleads people.
  3. It generates unnecessary argument about the infallible word of God.
  4. It subjects people to unnecessary mental distress, feelings of guilt or remorse.
  5. It can make people suffer undeserved criticism and ostracism.
  6. It can lead to shame and inferiority complex.
  7. It can result is a loss or waste of time, energy and resources. Yes, one of my relation’s wedding was summarily and arbitrarily terminated on its exact date just because the officiating pastor discovered that the couple had engaged in sex and that the bride was already pregnant, prior to the wedding day. After this, almost all the invitees scattered. The wedding meal and everything else were abandoned and wasted. The couple lost all the financial support they would have received from their guests all because of a wrong teaching.

Does God Forgive People Who Have Had Sex With Others Before Choosing A Marriage Partner?

As stated earlier, having sex with one’s marriage partner before wedding is not a sin. However, having sex with another person or people before and after choosing a marriage partner and after getting married is definitely a sin /sexual immorality in the form of fornication and adultery.

By divine law, you are married to and should remained married to the first person you had sex with. Otherwise, it becomes a sin. However, if, for one reason or another you did not marry that person. For instance, owing to belated discovery of couple incompatibility or waning conjugal love, or some other acceptable reason, God will forgive you but on condition that you repent. Repentance goes beyond just regret. It must involve a resolution never to repeat that act again.

God forgives all sins, except blasphemy against the Holy Spirit. But the rule of thumb is “Go and sin no more” not “Go and sin again or continue sinning.” If you are forgiven and afterwards you continue sinning, something terrible can happen to you and you must not blame it on anyone else. Thanks.

Bible Verses About Forgiveness, Even for Premarital Sex /Sex Before Marriage

If you have committed sexual immorality before and after choosing a marriage partner and have repented but are still worried about being forgiven by God, read The following Bible verses: MATTHEW 12:31, JOHN 8:11, ISIAH 1:18 and JOHN 5:14


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